Super Ninja Warriors to the Rescue

It started like any other Friday night, my husband and I just sat down to watch a movie. Suddenly, the secret phone rang (ok it was my cellphone) but it was an unrecognizable 800 number so we ignored it.  Ten minutes later the phone began to screech out- again. This time it was the distinctive ring of my lovely sister Ta. She sensed danger at the house of our dear mother. Ok, so she didn’t so much sense it as the alarm company called her and said someone had broken in. She had desperatly attempted to call the house to reassure herself and reached my mother but had been cut off moments later. No one had heard from her since. So, whisking into action, the ninja warriors geared up. As we headed towards the house, our lights turned down, it seemed quiet. Too quiet.  Parking at the bottom of the incredibly long and uphill driveway, we exited the vehicle and moved steath- like towards the gate to the house. As we approached the gate, ninja one effortlessly lept over the gate and motioned for me to do the same. As my legs lifted from the ground to leap, I thought to myself, nope not going to happen as I fell right onto the gate which emitted a horrifying noise that likely woke the neighbors.  Undeterred, the two ninjas continued up the stairs and into the house. Flying up the stairs to my parents bedroom, there was movement. Ninja one looked out, “Someones coming.” “Yes, it’s my dad.” As my father flicked on the lights, there was my mother, woken from her sleep. She looked at her ninja rescuers and said, “Bedtime. Go Home.” Eh, turns out she put the phone down and forgot to hang it up in all the confusion. Our heroes hung up the phone and all was right.

Also, this just: Green Beer makes you stupider than even regular beer. Case in point, I am neither from South Dakota nor did I come to Washington DC to save Buffalo. Also, I am not 17. As convincing as I’m sure these things sounded, indeed I believe green beer kills more brain cells or people are dumber than I thought.